Too Good To Be True????

During the Spring semester of my freshman year, a few of us decided that we just weren’t sexy enough for the 4 or 5 women that attended Penn State Mont Alto. To remedy this, we got gym memberships at this place called Malibu Gym. I think we liked the name because oddly enough, Malibu was also one of the beer drinking sites in the woods of Mont Alto.

I probably should’ve started questioning the “stability” of said gym when I found out that a 6-month membership was $30 ….that’s it – not $30 a month, but $30!!! Instead, I chose to overlook this glaring issue, and instead gloat about how great of a deal we got (not to mention give thanks for not having to “curb” my alcohol purchases). However, $30 per person for 6 months will not keep a gym functioning for a long period of time.

The second thing that I should’ve noticed was the autographed poster of Rick “The Model” Martel positioned right near the entranceway. No real gym has a poster of a wrestler called “The Model,” or at least they don’t prominently display it. Most people like gyms that have posters of real men – men like Lou Ferrigno, Ahnold Schwarzenegger, and Jean Claude Van Damm (sorry to exclude Steven Segall, but I said gym, not burger joint).

The owner gave us a workout program, which somehow was also included in the $30. I guess it worked well, but it was hard to determine how well the finished product would’ve been, considering the gym closed two months later … WITHOUT NOTICE! I wasn’t too pissed off about it though, because (A) we only paid $30, and (B) it was getting in the way of my studying/drinking time.