A New Twist on the Chicken Dance

Sometimes we used to go out and drink on a week night … o.k., we did it more than sometimes. But, in our defense, there was some fantastic deals that we couldn’t possibly afford to pass up ($1.00 pitchers at the Den, 50 cent black and tans at the G-Man, 5 cent wings at the Café).

One night, we decided to go to one of the bars, but Mung was unable to go because he actually had to study. Of course, he used Nittany Notes, because his notebook was curiously empty due to the fact that he was never able to make it to class (note – he wasn’t busy, he didn’t have any conflicts, and he wasn’t sick. He decided that scratching his balls and sleeping were more important to him).

The remaining roommates decided to get plastered. I forget to where we went to pickle our livers, due to the horrid events that came after the self-medication. As faithful roommates, we decided to come back and wake Mung up. You see, we thought he’d (a) enjoy being woken up by his drunk roommates, (b) certainly like to hear his inebriated roomies tell him undecipherable stories about what happened at the watering hole, and (c) he’d certainly enjoy the damp musty bar smell that we had managed to bring home with us.

But, we roommates were a creative bunch. Instead of just plowing the door down and making a loud ruckus, we planned a different entrance (actually, I’m not even sure we planned it – it just kind of happened). We flung Mung’s bedroom door open, and began to do a drunken chicken dance – never once looking to see if Mung was even awake. I believe we entertained ourselves with this for a good 5 minutes, before we tired of it.

Then, we glanced over at Mung’s bed and viewed in horror at the sordid appearance. Mung was smiling at us. Normally, this is scary enough. However, Mung was smiling at us, whilst wearing his birthday suit. We were frozen like Roman statues for what seemed to be hours (but was only probably 10 seconds). And then, we decided to “sacrifice” the closest-standing roommate to Mung. We flung Slant on top of Mung and exited the room as we heard the waning shrieks of Mung’s sacrificial lamb.